Friday, October 31, 2008

I can haz emotional basketcase...

& I can haz her everytime I look in the mirror! And, lately, I can haz her most times I log into WoW. I dunno y, I do know however that something has got to change for me. I have been "chronically ill" on & off for about 2 & a half years. When the docs told me it was "all in my head" & the "head" medications did not work, I stopped caring. Doesn't change the fact that I feel like shit more often then not. Doesn't change the fact that I am tired & worn out from simply working a 4-6 hour shift. Doesn't change the fact that somewhere along the way I not only stopped listening to a good friend that told me years ago "To thine own self be true.", I have choosen to utterly ignore that lovely tidbit of advice. I have tuned the "smart" people out & been living inside my own little head. Can be a frightfully dangerous place to live all alone in the dark sometimes.

Yes, Yes, to many of you folks that feel you may "know" me from the game or from myspace & somehow managed to find me here. (cause I can no longer accsess my myspace page) You might just be asking yourself, is this really the fun loving silly Shrinn we know? Everyone has their bugaboos, my friends, everyone!

Weird thing is tho, about 2&1/2 years ago is when I fell of the wagon & started binge drinking again. No, I am not a binge drinking currently. Not only can I not afford it but I cannot raise my son in a coherent manner in that state of mind. So I'm thinking that it might be time for me to get my ass back to those damned brainwashing meetings again. Cuz those people seem to really get me. So, if my mental health & head space begins to impinge on my game time, blog time & just plain sitting my big ole bum in front of my PC, so be it.

I thought Halloween an appropriate time to bring up my skeletons. Lookie there, Lich King isn't even out & I'm raising the dead!

1 comment:

Elystia said...

Aww Shrinn don't feel bad :(